Preparing for the Second Time Around

While getting married the second time around can be a wonderful experience, it is often worth exploring for ourselves the reasons why we are taking this important step, and so asking some important questions could be useful Working out the answers to our satisfaction may save a lot of heartache in the long run. The most important questions may include:

• When is the best time to re-marry? It is especially important to ask yourself this if your first marriage had a lot of pain involved in the separation and it wasn’t your choice to end things. Getting over the hurt of the past takes longer than some of us think, but the success of your second marriage depends greatly on whether or not you’re emotionally ready to re-partner with someone else.

• Why are we choosing to marry? Being alone is not easy after being married or in a long-term relationship, especially if you have children living with you. However, moving too quickly into a new relationship is no solution either. We need to ensure that the reasons we are re-marrying again are the right ones.

• Who are we choosing to commit to? Sometimes it is hard to face what worked and what didn’t work in your first marriage but when it comes to making a second choice we need to learn from that experience to clarify what sort of partner we want. Being in love is not enough to make a relationship work especially once the spark has died down and real life sets in.

• Are there children involved? Stepfamilies are in some ways like first-time-round families. They are also, in many other ways, vastly different. Most people who become a part of a stepfamily are unprepared for the differences. Whether the previous relationship ended through death, separation or divorce, all members need to adjust to your new relationship and these adjustments can often take time.

The Second Time Around Pre-Marriage Preparation Program is an approach that helps couples answer these sorts of questions and develop the skills, habits, attitudes, and enrichment techniques that lead to more enduring marriages. The program is education, not therapy based and addresses the normal issues and challenges that all couples face in the course of their marriage.

Note this is not a group workshop and so individual attention to your particular needs is ensured. For further information please contact me.